Welcome, friends, to a recipe as joyous as the dawn chorus. This one is outrageously easy to make, and perfect for a sombre Autumn afternoon.

Ingredients: One kilo of herring roe, a felt pocket, feta, rocket, salt, saffron.

The Method:

1) Gently salt your herring roe.

2) Place the herring roe in a large felt pocket.

3) Cradle the felt pocket for three to four hours.

4) Transfer the herring from the felt pocket onto a plate. Add rocket, feta and saffron.

5) Tuck into the Herring and Felt Chili.

6) Embrace the feeling of Herring and Felt Chili inside your belly. A feeling of longing, of sickness, or remorse, of regret. A Herring and Felt Chili for what could have been and a Herring and Felt Chili for what still may transpire. A Herring and Felt Chili for him. For her. For them. For all.

7) Make another dish of Herring and Felt Chili but this time leave it on a neighbour’s wall.

8) Recite a poem about Herring and Felt Chili which you have invented on the spot.

9) Cry yourself to sleep.

Serves: 1 to 2 people

Similar recipes: Herring and Satin Chili; Salmon and Felt Chili; Salmon and Satin Chili.